Summer is close and I miss Finland. There is no better feeling than swimming in Samppalinna outside pool at 6am and smell the blooming lilacs. Maybe some day again..

I am getting pretty tired of all the contradicting feelings I have about my homeland. I miss the food, I miss the nature, I miss this and that. BUT reading daily Helsingin sanomat via Internet reminds me of some of the reasons that made me want to leave in the first place.

I guess I just have to see where the future takes me.

I haven't touched my journal for a year. Other than having moved to another country and changed jobs three times I have not really accomplished much anything, apart from reading some voluntary biology. However, I have managed to arrange my life so poorly that it most of the time resembles a boot-camp, mainly because of money; the source of all evil.

This year I have not yet broken my New Year's resolutions apart from the one about phoning my grandparents a bit more often (even once would be more often). I have kept up with the plan of improving my healthy eating habits, having more excercise and the most important one, made my dog happy.  Actually, I am seriously considering taking a second dog from a rescue centre. Some canine company would benefit my dog. I don't want to put too much stress on my poor boyfriend who is already  nerve wrecked for all our money trouble and his crap job. But to be honest, another dog wouldn't make our situation much worse, if at all.

Bob the cat run away and we miss him. To honour my Tiikeri dog who turned 5 in February, I had her name and date of birth tattooed on my anckle with my own handwriting. This has made some roll their eyes, but just proves to me that they have missed a lot by never obviously experiencing a deep friendship with a remarkable canine.

Possibly not difficult to imagine the chaos in a 25 sq.m. flat considering there is a big dog, a chubby cat, curious rabbit and two people running around with an addition of a kitten who seems to interest the dog, being hated by the existing cat and ignored by the bunny. Obviously the kitten likes the bunny which makes the dog over protective in case the little cat will eat the rabbit. Robert seems to be happy alone in the toilet and is incredibly inactive to be a kitten. Maybe he is just tired after being stressed of wandering about for who knows how long. Anyways, he has a good appetite. I am now being called Dr. Doolittle at work.

On Monday we happened to be at the town during St. Patrick's parade. It was a petty little thing mainly consisting of lorries advertising their own business, not really having anything to do with being Irish or St. Patrick. There was also a group of 12 year old cheer leaders wagging their half naked body parts in the rhythm of "Do you want a piece of me" lyrics in the back round. A nice little addition was ASPCA dogs who were all walking nicely on the leash and wearing little scarfs with shamrock pattern. They got a good long walk but some idiot had arranged them to be in front of these screaming emergency service cars blowing their horns constantly. Must have been incredibly stressful for the poor dogs. The whole parade was so pathetic that I almost began to cry for both shame and sadness.

I have not written for ages.. I haven't really done much, just worked and stressed with my school projects. I went to Paris with Peter to see the Cure. Guys played for 4 hours and I was 25 meters form the stage so nothing to complain about. I do have a lot to complain about Ryanair but it's not worth mentioning. Anyways, it rained a lot and we walked a lot. Worth while.

Today I met a little cat. He greeted me in at the Civic centre. Four hours later when I left work he was still outside the doors screaming at me. You know me.. I took him home an gave him food. He is a lovely affectionate little kitten (5 moths old?)skinny and hungry. Now he is sleeping on a towel in our toilet. I call him Robert because he just looks like it with his spiky fur. He has a lovey little white nose even though he is otherwise all black. I will obviously advertise I have found a male kitten but secretly I hope nobody will call back so we can keep him.

Ei ollutkaan helppoa nousta varhain
Aistia vasyneiden jalkapohjien kipu lattiaa vasten
Ja hymyilla uudelle aamulle

Perillä Lisburnissa ja kaaosta on. Tanelille tiedoksi, että skype toimii tällä käyttäjänimellä. Sun maili ei nimittäin vastaanota mitään mitä lähetän. Kaikki pomppaa takaisin. Mikä sun mailiosoite nykyään sitten on? Mitään tekstareita en meinaan näillä taksoilla lähettele.

Yesterday I read this article that Peters friend or "friend" had written on feminism. It was.. well, interesting. I found many points that I didn't quite understand, that were only assumptions or just pure bollocks in my own opinion. I thought it might be a good idea to ask from the author himself some clarification for the statements I didn't understand.

And so I did. Unfortunately through an instant messenger. This article was named "Keeping Feminism Out of IT" which was a bit unsuccessful name due to the fact that he actually didn't talk that much of it on IT. I asked about his definitions for terms such as "feminism" and "equality". I still am not quite sure what he means with it. He said that this article is about Manifesto Feminism (as he calls it), some sort of radical feminism that thinks women are not equal to men but superior. I call that just radical feminism. He gave me some interesting percentage information like "90% of feminism is of this Manifesto Feminism".

Is it? I don't think so. I am not sure anyone else thinks so either because I can't check his facts anywhere because he hasn't put his sources in the end of the article. Technically this also means that he is stealing someone else text or research information by giving the image that he himself has made all these observations.

Text itself was not written as well as one could hope for. There is some poor grammar or choices of the order of his chapters that make the text refer to absurd things. On of the funniest one of these is one where the text gives the image as if the author was trying to say that football is a romantic sensibility. I doubt he meant to say that.

A thing that did my head in was this:
"But what is the explanation for the new discoveries - that seem to prove that men and women are neurologically different in some fundamental way - that are constantly being announced by the press? They're entertaining nonsense [obviously the author must have done lots of research to be able to say it is nonsense]
Psychology is not an exact definitive science like physics"

The author is actually saying that neurology and psychology are the same thing. Are they.. well he said "No I didn't state they are" I think he did in his text. "..but they are very close to each other". Well, he didn't mention that in his text. He also did define lots of things such as intelligence and so on BUT not the term feminism which would be a lot more important if he wants to talk about it. Actually, he doesn't talk about it that much coming to think of it. He talks about whether men and women are equal but not about feminism. Unfortunately he has also very very poor logic that works a bit like this:

Cats are mammals. Therefore all mammals are cats.

He also says "Why is it always automatically wrong if men are better represented in some jobs?" ehm.. who states this? "Most feminists do" he replied. I'd again like to know where he got that information..

I tried to help this person in his work by telling him that to me it seems that he has a theory and he just looks for information that supports it instead of searching objective information that might also prove him wrong. I gave him couple of addresses where he might found feminists that represent the opposite opinion to his, so he could get better research material.

I also said that I don't think he knows that much of women and feminism anyway. At the age of 30 or so he lives with his mum. His income consists of the pocket money that his mum gives to him and he is single, I doubt voluntarily. I don't think that realistic a person with this back round can write an article or a book (as he is trying to do) on this subject because the lack of experience and knowledge. I asked whether he is afraid of women.

A normal sensible person would've said "No I am not. Interesting opinion by the way.." or "Yes, as a matter of fact.." BUT this mature 30 year old person said this: "I think you are a rude and ignorant princess who is used to doing and saying what she wants. I doubt you wanted to make an objective debate in the first place. I don't want to continue this conversation. Goodbye." Then he left.

APPLAUSE

I proved my point about his maturity and ability to write about women. For heavens sake.. I acted that way too once but that was when I was 13 and in my worse teens. When getting criticism he first insulted me and then run a way.

What it comes to being a rude princess, I think I should take that as a compliment :) Most people have to actually marry a prince or have a king as dad to be a princess. And I wasn't even being rude. I am frank and outspoken. I think this authors problem is that people pity him. He is so used to people being too nice to him that when someone actually says honestly that he didn't do very well in something he just gets all offended. This takes me to the other statement he made about me: That I am used to doing and saying what I want.

DUH

Isn't that the ideal? What should I do then, what my parents want? what he wants? Not say what I think but lie because then no-one (except for me) feels bad? Welcome to reality Mr. Author. Unfortunate thing is that without taking criticism one can never develop and therefore I think he is doomed not to ever success as a writer.

Quite absurd to call me ignorant too. I am probably only person this far who has actually wanted to have a conversation about his article. I am actually one of the least ignorant people I know. In a way I feel sorry for him. If he is as mature as I think he is now crying in the corner of his room. His mum will bring him hot chocolate and hug him and say "Don't worry honey, You'll meet a nice girl someday. They are not all bullies".

It seems I was the best in the whole class in our English spoken exam.

wow..

First time ever that I am the best in anything. (though I of course totally screwed up the written part and I have to re-take it or I an never face myself again.)

What happened last year (major):
*one cancer cured (for now)
*I moved house
*I got medication
*I got myself a wonderful boyfriend
*I traveled to Ireland twice
*I got a cat
*I moved together with boyfriend
*I gained 8kg

Things I achieved:
*began to go to the gym again. And managed to keep on going there.
*won my fear of flying
*won my fear of travelling
*learned better English
*learned to read cat behavior
*learned to cook
*learned that blueberry yogurt is not suitable for cooking
*learned to go to sleep in time
*got rid on couple of bad "friends"

Things I really should achieve this year:
*loose 8kg
*find a job
*estimate if food is HOT before starting to eat it.

I was ill for a week before Christmas. It began with a swollen throat, continued as a runny nose and ended up as a horrible cough. On Christmas Boyfriend and I watched movies and shared a nice meal consisting of wine, lentil loaf, mushroom gravy, swed casserole and salmon. Lovely.

On Christmas day we went to my parents and had nice time. Day after that we went to my dads parents and had a little less nice time..

From my grandparents my brother got money. I got a seasonal oven glove that was originally a freebie from Readers Digest.

I got Littlest Pet shop "Vet station" from Boyfriend and as a present for myself I had my hair cut short today.